Steps to Improving Low Self Esteem

Hello there you beautiful beings of the blog-o-sphere!

Today's post is all about self esteem, and how to improve it!

So many people struggle with low self esteem and it is definitely an ongoing problem. I think it is important that we learn to love ourselves before anyone else. You should not feel as though you need to change yourself in order to find someone to love you, if you love and embrace yourself you will start to realise that no one else is worth your love if you feel you have to change things about your true self to be with them! At the end of the day you are with yourself more than anyone else so you need to start embracing you for you, flaws and all. Losing weight, dying your hair, getting surgery, none of it will solve the problems in your life – you will still be the same you with the same problems! Instead of focusing on the things you dislike, start focusing on the things you do like and learn to love yourself for everything that you are! Focus on your strengths, figure out what you are good at! There are plenty of things that you are wonderful at, so use those things to build your confidence! No one is good at everything so do not fret if you are bad at something! Learn from your mistakes - you don’t have to be good at everything like I just mentioned- use your mistakes to your advantage! Don’t worry about slipping up once in a while, the whole point of life is to live and learn! Do what you love – make time everyday to do something that you truly enjoy! Do something that makes you happy to improve your mood! Life is all about the little things as well as the momentous moments.

Tell yourself you are beautiful - stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are! Keep telling yourself and fake it until you make it! Really mean what you are saying and realise all of the beautiful things about yourself - including any flaws (they make you unique!) Turn your negative thoughts into positive ones – instead of thinking your legs are big, be thankful that you have legs to take you places. Whatever the negative thought is, try to stay optimistic and see the positive side of things! It will greatly improve your mood and outlook on life! Realise that beauty has no measure on your life. Everyone has worth and is special in their own individual way. I am sure you are the a beautiful person but even if weren't , who really cares? What does it really matter? All that matters is that you are happy and love your life- and that should not be dependent upon whether or not you are aesthetically pleasing to another's eyes. Remember that weight has no relevance to beauty! Whether you are 100 or 300 pounds you can be beautiful! Please do not relate size to worth- it's a dangerous game you don't want to play. Spend time with people that you love and who love you back! It is important to spend time with loved ones-they will boost your mood and confidence! If people have a negative impact on your life then you don’t have to spend time with them! Don’t feel like you must stick around for everyone. You have to put yourself first and make sure you are happy! Don’t let others drag you down! Remember that life is simple, we just tend to complicate the process. Remember the simplicity in life and let it help you to stay calm and remain focused on the important things! Love yourself and embrace everything present in your life! Enjoy it while you can and don’t let everything stress you out so much! Be generous, help others, be kind to others, and give when you can. It will spread love and make you feel better as a person.

Talk to yourself the way you talk to someone you care about- what would you say to good friend who was going through the same things that you are going through? If you hate yourself, you are likely say things to yourself that you would never dare say to another person. What would you say to somebody else who has the exact same issues as you? What could you say to help yourself? Recognize that beliefs do not equal truths: often, people believe the things that they tell themselves. If you think you are a failure, you may believe that is an absolute truth. There is a tip I learnt, it is a cognitive behavioral technique called “the three C’s” referring to 'catch, challenge and change'. Catch yourself in the moment if you start thinking something negative about yourself, then try to challenge the thought and change it into something positive.

Embrace the concept of “good enough”: Many people feel they should be perfect. These constant high expectations deny the fact that imperfection is an ingredient within our lives. If you are one of these people with extremely high expectations for yourself, perhaps try asking yourself why you are a perfectionist and try to pinpoint the reasons behind it. Try out some meditation and mindfulness, it can help evoke feelings of self-compassion as well as love and kindness toward yourself and others. If you hate yourself for mistakes you made, make amends: Stop all the negative thinking and embrace a positive mind as well as positive thoughts/actions. You can start doing this by surrounding yourself with positive and uplifting people. When there are positive people around you, it helps you to absorb positive energy for yourself. When you are having fun and enjoying life, most likely you’re thinking about how much fun you are having and not dwelling on the negative things in life. Remember that no one has their entire life figured out and throughout life, things will happen and won't go according to plan and we have to adapt and learn to be okay with these changes. 

Hope my advice helps! Please let me know if you’re ever in the need of some more help, advice, support etc. I’m always here and only an ask away. Take care,

Thanks for stopping by!

- Olivia Charlotte Alice

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